This is Home
by Mimozka
Summary: sequel to "No Need to Say Goodbye". Home is where the heart is, or so they say... Suspian. rated T because I'm paranoid. Reviews and constructive critisism are appreciated. movie/book verse and slightly AU


**_Hey guys! I'm back! _**

**_First and foremost, I want to thank all of you who faved and reviewed "No need to say goodbye" you made my heart soar! Your reviews were heart warming and made my days. I'm glad the fic moved you, because this means I've achieved my purpose. :) _**

**_Some of you expressed a wish to have a second part to the story - well here you go! _**

**_To be honest I was a bit reluctant at first because I was afraid that a sequel might ruin it... Then I came up with that idea! _**

**_It is very short, I don't like it. *sigh* but I guess I shouldn't push my idea anymore because I might ruin everything..._**

**_IF YOU ARE READING THIS AND YOU HAVE NOT READ "No Need to Say Goodbye" please go to my profile and read it because you might be a little confused, seeing as this story is a continuation of it. But then again you might not have to_**...

_**I'll let you read now. **_

_**PS: the title was once again inspired by the PC OST. This time it's Switchfoot with - "This is home"**_

_**

* * *

This is home**_

The first day of June was definitely not the typical summer day.

The rain was pouring mercilessly without showing the slightest intention of stopping.

Grim clouds were staining the sky in an angry deep shade of gray; not allowing even the slightest, slimmest ray of sunshine light the Earth.

Many were upset by that day's weather, for their hopes for a warm and sun filled beginning of the summer had been ruined.

But for one family, this weather was somewhat soothing. It was as if Mother Nature was mourning along with them.

Sunshine on such a black day seemed like the worst kind of blasphemy to the grieving hearts of the family.

Two parents were grieving for the loss of their child.

Three siblings were mourning for the loss of their beloved sister.

And a world away, a whole nation was mourning the loss of their Queen.

* * *

Susan Pevensie was happy for the first time in years.

But this happiness was still haunted by a shadow. A dark, awful threat called doubt.

She hadn't told a thing about it to anyone, but she should have known _he _would notice.

"Susan," his voice was deep and slightly accented and she couldn't help the pleasurable shiver that went down her spine as her name fell from his lips. "What's troubling you?"

She should have known he'd notice. She should have hidden it better.

She knew he'd see through her. That was just something he could do, he could see right through her into the very core of her soul.

Ever since she took his hand at the crash scene and stepped along with him into Aslan's Country there has been nearly no intimate contact between the pair of them.

Sure, they talked, laughed, and he asked her about her family and life in England.

She questioned him about his stay in Aslan's Land.

All in all, they have been acting _friendly_ with one another. But Susan didn't want friendly. Not after all those years of desperate longing. She wanted more.

That's why in a moment of madness she decided to come clean about everything and ask him the question that has been troubling her ever since she took his hand.

She had no right to ask, but for once in her life she didn't care. She was being selfish.

"Caspian," she whispered his name reverently, like the gentlest prayer.

Said king raised his eyes to meet hers as he waited for her question.

"Where is your wife?" Susan asked directly. There was no point beating around the bush.

Caspian's eyes widened. He had expected her to ask anything. Anything but this.

Soon enough though he shook himself out of his stupor, remembering that she was still waiting for an answer.

"She passed away." Was all he replied in a somber voice.

"I know that," Susan replied softly and squeezed his hand as if to apologize for her questioning. "What I meant was, is she _here_?" she motioned their surroundings with her free hand.

"No. She was a star, a daughter of a star, to be precise. They don't come here." Caspian explained. His voice was a unique mixture of gentleness and calmness.

He turned to face her fully now.

Caspian held Susan's hands with his and was once again amazed by the tranquility that washed over him. Holding Susan's hands, being with Susan felt _right. _It felt as if being with her was the very reason of his existence.

"Let's sit down, My Queen." He suggested softly and sat on the soft evergreen grass.

Susan joined him without a second thought, her hand still intertwined with his.

"Why do you keep calling me that?" Susan cut him off curiously.

When they first met, she knew he did it out of respect since her title was superior to his. He kept calling her that after his coronation, before she left, but she suspected it was simply because they were standing in front of all Narnia.

When she went to him in his final hour, he still called her that, even though he was married to another. In front of his own son, no less. The Prince couldn't have been happy to hear this.

"Because, my dearest Susan, you are my queen. Simple as that." Caspian chuckled and brushed a lock of hair that has fallen into her eyes.

"You see," he hurried to add seeing as she was about to ask another question. "Technically speaking, you are not my queen. I've married another and legally she bears that title."

Susan felt as if she had been slapped as she heard those words.

She made a move to get up, but Caspian held her down.

"Let me finish, please." He pleaded with her.

As much as Susan acknowledged and accepted the fact that Caspian had married and was happy with another woman, it hurt beyond imagination to hear him call her 'his queen' a title that was reserved strictly for Susan herself.

"By saying that she was my queen I meant that she was the one ruling alongside me. That's all." He could feel Susan relax a little in his arms. "But you see, while you share the same title, it has not the same meaning as hers. While Lillandil ruled my people and country, you, Dearest, ruled my heart." His voice became painfully soft towards the end.

"You mean to say that you married without love?" Susan asked bluntly. She was trying to understand him to the best of her abilities.

"No," the king shook his head. "I loved Lillandil. She was my wife and I've vowed to love her till death did us part… But you see, my love to her doesn't hold a candle to the love I have for you…" Caspian was finding himself at a loss of words to explain his emotional turmoil.

"After I proposed to her, I told her about you. It may sound cruel, but I told her that you are my one true love. I told her that no matter what happens you will always have the bigger and better part of my heart. I told her that not because I wanted to hurt her, quite the opposite really, I wanted her to be aware of what she's agreeing to. She deserved to know the truth. I told Lillandil that I cared deeply for her and that I will grow to love her as sincerely as I could with time. And in truth I did grow to love her. She was gentle and kind and she also gave me my son – the most precious gift I could ever receive." Caspian stopped talking then, noticing the tears on his love's face. He hurried to brush them away.

He embraced Susan tightly in his arms and murmured his apologies for upsetting her with his detailed explanation.

Susan just shook her head and continued sobbing. She wasn't upset because of his explanation. Yes, it hurt hearing about him proposing to another woman, but that was not what brought tears to her eyes.

The reverence and awe in his voice when he mentioned his son was just more than she could bear. She saw it in his eyes – the happiness his son had brought him. She saw the happiness _she_ had brought him by giving him his son.

Susan wished she could bring such joy to him. She wished Rillian was _their_ son. She wished she was allowed to stay behind with him after his coronation.

Even though she was with him now, she found herself wishing for everything they could have had.

"I wish I could have given you all that…" Susan sobbed without thinking.

A few seconds later she gasped sharply and clasped her hand to her lips, realizing how awful this must have sounded.

Realizing what this was all about, Caspian pressed her even closer to himself.

"It would have made me the happiest man alive to have had all that with you, My Queen, but I cannot regret my decisions."

He whispered softly in her ear. "We may have been robbed of the opportunity to have a family and to grow old together, but we can spend forever with one another now. Together."

"Together." Susan repeated and tightened her arms around him.

"May I kiss you, My Queen?" Caspian asked with a sly smile and caressed her cheek with one hand.

"You must." Was Susan's quiet, ecstatic reply.

And so their lips collided with each other passionately, yet gently in the most wonderful kiss they have experienced.

But then again it seemed that each next kiss of theirs was better than the previous ones.

That realization made Susan smile widely as they parted reluctantly for breath.

"Lillandil made you happy in your mortal life and for that I will be forever grateful. But in this life you are mine, I'm the one that will make you happy." She beamed at her beloved whose smile was just as radiant upon hearing those words.

"Yes, Dearest, I'm all yours." He grinned and pressed his lips to hers once again.

* * *

*~*~*

During the next two hours the rain had miraculously weakened and was now a soft drizzle. Despite that, there was still no sunshine as the sun was hidden by the heavy clouds.

The mourning family watched in endless pain as the casket was lowered into the freshly dug grave.

All five of them were overwhelmed by grief. As they were watching their loved one depart into the cold ground it hit them with the force of a bus that they have indeed lost her forever.

But among all the grief and pain, there were three siblings who were relieved. Not relieved at the loss of their sister of course!

They felt relief because they knew that she was in a much better place.

She was home.

At that moment the dark clouds above them parted and the tiniest ray of sunshine lit the grave.

In this moment, Lucy Pevensie could swear that she saw her sister.

She saw Susan standing on the other side of her grave, facing their family. She was waving goodbye with one hand while her other was tightly wrapped around Caspian.

He in turn bent down and kissed her cheek lovingly and then too, waved at Lucy.

A small smile appeared on her lips.

Yes, her sister was indeed home.

* * *

_**Sooo what did you think of it? Did it compliment the other story or did it ruin it? Be honest with me, please. Your honesty is more important than a positive or a negative review. **_

_**I decided to have Lucy see Susan, because she has the most faith out of the Pevensies... Lucy seeing Susan was sort of a goodbye they didn't get to have, and it was also meant to give the family the peace of mind that the distant, sad, Susan was now happy.**_

_**Also, there will not be a third part. If I'm writing another Suspian (and I suspect that I will) it will be another storyline, seeing as this one is finished. Please don't ask for a sequel because I can't give you any.**_

_**Leave me some love, please?**_

_**till next time,**_

_**Mimozka**_


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